left behind in the dust of your feet

i'm left behind in the dust of your feet,
the steps that you take lead you farther and farther away
away from all of this, the pain the hurt the lies and the deceit
but in the end, it leads you away from me too...


haihz. i feel angry again. but i'm so tired of feeling angry and sad. i cannot hold it in la. i don't know how to express it but through my blog. nyways, i'm feeling depressed again. i'm depressed about everything. my life, how i look, my studies, my friends, my accomplishments and sad to say i'm depressed that i'm depressed. it's kinda lame in a way but i what the hell la.
haihz. i don't know why i care so much, i guess i'm jealous? of the way you treat them but not me. people keep telling me don't be so depressed anymore. but i can't help but be ok. maybe i suffer from depression? i don't know. i don't know what to do now.

i want to move on
but the cement blocks i built around us
is holding me in
keeping me from reality
but making me absorb the pain

everybody's moving on while i'm left behind. nyways. even though its not the new year, i gotta make some new resolutions.

1. forget bout him
2. forget bout her
3. gotta be my cheerful self again


i'm hiding behind a mask
a mask of smiles
that forever hides the sorrow
that no one sees or hears
and will never know of
until the mask is taken away
to reveal the true self


xoxo
joanna

P.S. wrote all the poems myself lehh. lol.