embarassed...

haihz... i don't know why i've been feeling so emo lately... well... except for today la... today i was so hyper i did things which i regret later (refer to the title)... my results sucked by the way... i passed all my subs la... but there are so many bad marks that i really regret not studying over... haihz... PMR is like in 3 more months and i cant believe im still blogging away, onlining till late at night and having afternoon naps... its not that im not worried... of course i am... its just that i've lost the will power and concentration to sit down and stare aimlessly at the revision books... everytime i open one, i end up thinking and thinking... so i've kinda given up...
come to think of it, i've given up on almost everything in life... lol... im thinking again... haha...
i've given up on some of my friends...
i've given up on all my ambitions...
i've given up on love...
i've even given up on myself...
maybe thats why i love to read romance novels... cause everything turns out right in the end... there is never a story book that doesn end happily... come to think of it... everything always goes right in the end... even if one of the characters die, somebody else will go in turn to replace that character... and at the end ' and they all lived happily ever after'... its getting kinda depressin to read story books like that actually... everything always turns out right for them in the end... hmmm... i think im going mad... im actually comparing myself to fictional characters... haha...
well, for those who don't know what i've been talking about from the top... basically i feel damn emo and lonely le... its not that i don have people beside me to help me through life... i have tons of them... its just that well... theres always the time when ur sitting alone in class and wondering what happened to all my friends... or the time when your walking out alone after school wondering where everybody is... its not only that... evrybody has people by their side bad mouthing them... we just don't know it or we are vaguely aware of it... yet we can't do anything... we can only watch them as they do what they are best at doing... back stabbing people... haihz... why can't we just have the power to read each others minds and know what they are thinking instead of going through the process of hurt and tears...

haihz.... this post so emo la... =.=...

on to happier notes... i think im gonna watch transformers la... yeah!... lol... im waitin for harry potter though... my birthday is coming up to... and people pls... stop asking me what i want... haha... cause i seriously do not know le... haha...

P/S... i can't believe that im staying up every night just to wait for that guy to come online... lol... i feel like a stalker... haha... (im not revealing the identity of the guy... its for me and my close friends to know and for the rest of you to find out)... lmao!!!

xoxo
JoAnNa..

im starting to feel hyper again... haha... so random...