life sucks...

life sucks. i just feel so depressed for no reason at all. maybe i have a few reasons but compared to the problems that i hear bout from other people. i don't really think my problems are that big...
i feel like bursting. i just keep everything to myself nowadays. whenever somebody is talking to me i'll be like, yeah, ok, whatever or i'll answer properly la. but then it would be total silence cause i don't know what to say and i just start thinking. i can't help it. i can't help keeping everything to myself. i know i have best friends to trust and things like that, but i still can't tell them this stuff, i don't know how to say it out loud, so guys, you need to be patient with me these few weeks kay.
and as Sue Ann loves to say i hate bloody bitches and their bitchiness. if you wanna be a bitch, do it somewhere else where it is appreciated, not in front of me. and your not only a bitch, your a fake. don't think i don't know. you just do whatever everybody else is doing to fit in. it's so damn obvious. so you, and your other bitchy friend can just go die.
i really didn't wanna start flaming anyone in my blog at first. but you have just ruined my perectly good record of only writing good things in my blog. and i'm also pissed about that.
i feel like crying. sorry for being so emo today.

<3
joanna.

haihz...

me so boredddd... ugghhhhhh... i finish my drawing d... and now i have no more inspiration... ughhhhhh... i want something to do la... or someone to talk to... ughhhhh... ughhhhh... ughhhhh...

oh yeah
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOUISE!!
hope you enjoyed it... lol...

bbbbooorrreeeddd ahhh...
my schedule next week damn busy la... haihz

monday
morning - school
afternoon - debating?!

tuesday
morning - school
afternoon - tuition
night - tuition

wednesday
morning - school
afternoon - tuition

thursday
morning - school
afternoon - violin

friday
morning - school
noon - ed board / css meeting?!?!

saturday
morning - tennis
night - mass

sunday
morning - bible studies and confirmation

haihz... i'm tired... but i don't feel like sleeping... weird eh... aiya... i better try and go to sleep la... lol... byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...

<3
joanna...

my other cousin...

my cousin ... cute horh... lol...

my cousins came up last weekend for like two days... we had fun... lol...

it was like... playing carroms everyday... which can be bad but improved my aiming skills... haha

we also watched a movie together and ended up laughing like shit..

and then at night cause megan wanted to sleep with me and micheal wanted to sleep with megan, we joined the two beds together and sleep three together.... haha... very funny cause i couldn't get up in the morning... so every few minutes they would come into the room and try to wake me up... lol... in the end... i finally managed... haha...

and then we went out for dim sum the next day... and i had some

REALLY GOOD LO MAI GAI ( for sue ann xD)

and dim sum lo... haha... we ate at Oriental at Jaya... erm... not sure wad section lol...

and then they went home on Sunday afternoon... it was fun with the here... even though they have a strange sense of what is creepy and what isn't...

im gonna miss them... haihz... but i think they're coming next holiday... yippeee...

<3

joanna

projects and results...

heyyy...
my results have finally come back in my report card... anyway... my mum's warning was that the c's have to beome b's and the b's have to become a's... and well, the a's stay as a's lo... haha... but i only have one a after all... haha... so nothing much has happened lately... its been soooooo boring... but i've been busy la... haha... i don't know why when im busy i seem to be more cheerful le... haha... so i have erm... my sivik, geo and sejarah project to finish... geo i did a bit d... need to do the soal selidik which i will be doing with Louise... and then sejarah i can't decide between chinese marriages or catholic marriages... lol... friendster is as slow as usual... but i know it will be even slower on the desktop so i'm not really complaining... you guys know superman returns that show right?... yesterday was the first time i watched it even though its like one year old... haha... so swt-ed right... i better get back to my projects la..
before that, en.lim's period today got me thinking about what i should be when i grow up... i have no idea whatsoever... if only i were rich then i wouldn't need to worry horh... lol...
but i'm thinking something along the lines of lawyer or stuff... but that would mean tons of working hours... not to mention the people that you might meet along the way may not be good... and this country'slegal system isn't so good as well... so i don't know la... haha...

<3
joanna

my kneeeee... PG 13

ahhhhhhh... its bleedin... im dyin... dyin... dyin!!!!...

lol... not so dramatic la... haha... it just bloddy hurt when i put the alcohol swab lo... and then the black black stuff cannot wash off one... i don know why... haha... i know its gross... even my cousin standing behind me now is screaming

"its so grossss!!!! so gross!!! GROSS!!! "

haha... so yea... anywayz... the amazing race thingy was fun... hmm... you think i lost any weight ah... haha... but i haven't gotten any darker lo... anywayz... my resolution from now on is to get fitter... wakaka... i seriously suck at running la... especially since we pratically had to try and catch up with khoo the whole time... so yeah... haha...

<3

joanna

my birthday list...

every year i face the same problem during my birthday that is everybody keeps asking me what i want... haha... so i have decided to make my list... and then u guys just choose la... its not really expensive... lol...

~ fall out boy's album - infinity on high
~ a new hp... ahah... kiddin..
~ a Roxy bag =p
~ a stuffed toy... =o)
~ a card
~ a reload card
~ things to hang on my hp
~ storybooks... preferably fantasy ones la... i love dragons... haha
~ be creative la... haha...

got to go la... byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

<3
joanna...

unpredictable...

im so sorry u guys that i haven't updated for so long... i've just been busy and well lazy... haha... anyway... my stupid windows live messenger won sign me in... its like the two people keep going round and round and round... bluek... and i miss chatting online... so well... my com sucks... haihz... i think it needs to be reformatted le... but i don't know how la.. and even if i did im scared i'll mess something up cause now i don't have my brother to blame if something goes wrong... anywayz... i'm so bored... i feel so depressed le... my life sucks... haihz... heres why
- i have a very high phone bill this month
- my results sucked
- the guy of my dreams isn't the guy of my dreams
- i can't stop eating
- it's so bloody hot
- i'm being forced to do things that i don't like and am doing them for the sake of doing them
- i feel so isolated and alone
- i know i have great friends and should be grateful but i still feel depressed
- my msn won't sign me in
- my com sucks
- my weight sucks
-haihz... everything sucks
- i've started swearing so much!!! >.<
i know i sound like a whinner and should be grateful for everything that i have... but i just can't help the feeling you know... and i have a bz schedule next week... haihz... i feel light-headed just thinking bout it... below... its the activities that i have after school..
monday - basketball/debating?!?!
tuesday - mary chan(afternoon), pn. bibi (night)
wednesday - mary chan
thursday - violin
friday - not sure yet... lol...
theres still some other stuff that i forgot d... but i just feel so tense... nowadays i wake up in the morning thinking of the things that i should do that day... its not normal... i just don't know why i'm getting to be so over the edge... i feel like i could snap at any moement and just start screaming my head off... i just know its gonna happen one of these days... i've never had a brakedown in my whole entire life and i don't really mean to start now... i think im so tense because of the PMR... if thats true... why does everybody else look so realaxed and happy all the time... while i'm so depressed inside and smiling outside...
i feel like rhyming now... haha... so random... haihz..

word of the day
gi-gi-gantic (invented by Briana and Louise)

song of the day
if i had a hammer
(lol... don't ask... download it and see... haha)

i feel so frustrated la!!!!!! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!

p/s... i hope i pass ed board!!... and debating!!! and get to help with the rumah hijau thing!!! and the basketball is sucessful!!! pray for me!!

<3
joanna...

camp

our legs!!! lol...

hanna and me... my hair so messy la... lol...

milo, anyone?... lol...

the floor outside... haha...

ribena shud pay me for advertising... lol...

me and louise... i look drunk... lol... after wash hair...

lol... i kinda blurred it and edited it thats why it looks liddat... lol...

b-ball... lol... try and spot me...

lol... copy from one tree hil... peyton drew it in that show...

love this pic!... me, azilia, louise

pictures tell a thousand words... lol... overall... it was so much fun!!..

<3

joanna...

cookies!!!

one big happy cookie family!... haha...

its as big as debbie's hand!!!...

after!!!

before...

first batch! lol... small is mine big is debbie... haha...




cookiess... yum yum... lol... me and my cousin baked choc chip cookies cause erm... i wanted to!lol... i'm in a damn bouncy mood now... haha... update bout these few days la... i had camp (will post pics later) and then my cousin stayed over from tuesday until today... and we had tons and tons of shoppin!!... u might ask where... of course at the famous dirty market in old town... ahahaha.. i fell at the stairs there ya noe... luckily no scratches... haha... so we went shoppin... and i bought a t-shirt with skulls on it and since it was less than RM10 my mum didn't mind... haha... my cousin bought the black one and i bought the white one... lol... back to the bakin... it was fun... haha... i kept messing up everything... luckily my mum and debbie were there... lol.. so it was really good!!... but too sweet... haha... after eating a few sure can get diabetes one... lol... kiddin la... i wanna try nd bake it again with cinnamon and less sugar and see how it turns out... lol...

anyway...

word of the day (invented by louise at camp)
shoap - combination of shampoo & soap

byeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

<3
joanna

funny lunch...

i just came back from lunch with my grandma's family... haha... we were eating at the oriental... damn funny la the conversations... my uncle used to be in the air force... so he is like damn expert in beating people and stuff... so he was telling us about his adventures... and how he trained his son.. i was listening and thinkin... ' shit wei... i seriously pity the son'... and then there they moved on to the topic of NS ya noe... so my uncle was like...
uncle - red
bro - blue

before you go for NS, ask your mum and dad to buy me lunch and come see me, i'll teach you how to protect yourself...
okay la
huh?!... what... it's 'ok uncle!'
(my bro had food in his mouth and could not speak. after waitin)
oh. ok uncle

haha... damn zha dou rite... and then it didn't end there le... haha... he was telling us about the NS then... i duno bout u guys but i don't read the newspapers... so they were talking about the girl who drowned... i won't say the details here la... haha...

anyways... that was lunch... then we went to the reject shop... i really liked something.. but my mum was like... i think now u have enoguh clothes... so thats the end of my shoppin... haihz...

<3
joanna...

life sucks...